Sick...Cranky...Whiny...UGH!

This week Everett, our 2 year old, has been sick. It's been a long time since I have had a kid this young be sick like this. It's so difficult when they can't really tell you what is wrong. They just whine and cry and are out of sorts.

Confession...this can make me a little cranky myself. It can be draining, right?

But at the same time I feel so helpless. I want to take it away from him. I know most of us parents would do anything to take away our child's hurt, discomfort, illness, or distress. But the reality is that we can't. We have to just love them and hold them and practice our patience as they lash out at us because...

-we are their comfort...

-their stability...

-the one they know will always be there when they are struggling.

With a 2 year old who can't communicate very well, I find myself getting frustrated. I am walking all over the house pointing to things as I try to figure out what exactly he is wanting. I sit and he wants me to stand...I stand and he wants me to sit...He pulls me to the kitchen I think he might be hungry but I am met with "NO." Oh...did I mention while he has been sick he has learned the word "no?" Oh yeah...super fun. Everything is "NO." But then he will cuddle up on my lap and he will snuggle in close and everything for a moment seems to be right for him even if just for a moment. He makes me feel like all he needed was just for his mommy to calmly hold him...make him feel safe and secure...and remind him that he is loved even when he is tired and sick and cranky. And I think of all those babies and kids that just want someone to make them feel like this. As parents

we can get so caught up in our own stuff and we can forget that there is nothing more important than stopping and just reminding our kids of this when they need it...which is usually the times they are the most unlikable.

My husband and I have a thing were we will say "I even like you" because you know what I am always going to love my husband...I am always going to love my kids...but sometimes they are not likable.

This is true in many situations...not just when they are sick.

When my teenagers are angry at something...or when they are depressed...or when they just feel off...or whatever drama they are dealing with in there life is overwhelming them...I am the one who takes the brunt of the emotions they can't put into words.

-And you know what...I am okay with that...Why?

Because it means they know they can act anyway they need to and I will always be here. -They trust me to always be here.

-They have confidence I will always be there.

-They know I am a safe place to express the things they don't even know they are feeling.

These actions can totally be coming subconsciously. They may not even know there is something going on with them until one thing sets them over the top. They can be reacting in anger to a simply question or direction I have given them and the reaction might catch them off guard...but how I chose to respond will set the tone for how it continues. If I lash out back it escalates and all of a sudden we are in a shouting match.

-And trust me this has been a lesson for me! I am definitely guilty of letting this get the better of me a time or two. My initial reaction is to want to get angry and yell back.

If I can keep myself calm and ask some questions to get them self reflecting a little bit I might stand a chance of helping them to realize I am not the person they are upset with...BUT I am the person they are comfortable with...And I wouldn't do anything to change that...even if it means I get angry teenager moods unfairly projected onto me. Because you know what at the end of the day...at least they are still talking to me in some sort of fashion...they get to be reminded I care and I will listen and love them...and I think that is a win.

*On a side note...if you want to pray no one else gets the yuck...we would appreciate it! And by no one else...I really mean me...because if momma goes down...the whole house falls apart...am I right??